


Selfish

by idrilhadhafang



Series: Shot Down AU [1]
Category: Star Wars Sequel Trilogy
Genre: Aftermath of Torture, Alternate Universe - Canon Divergence, Angry Poe Dameron, Angst, Beginnings of Poe Dameron/Kylo Ren, Injury Recovery, Love/Hate, M/M, Pilot Poe Dameron, Poe Dameron Needs A Hug, Poe Dameron Saves Kylo Ren, Poe Dameron in love, Poe Dameron/Kylo Ren Angst, Poe Dameron/Kylo Ren-centric, Pre-Poe Dameron/Kylo Ren, Protective Poe Dameron, Scars, pilot Kylo Ren
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-06-07
Updated: 2019-06-07
Packaged: 2020-04-12 05:30:24
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 665
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/19125562
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/idrilhadhafang/pseuds/idrilhadhafang
Summary: It’s definitely a motivation in Poe’s actions.





	Selfish

**Author's Note:**

> Prompt: Snowed In
> 
> Disclaimer: I own nothing.

He woke from the crash pretty much slowly, like he was swimming up out of sleep. Even as he forced himself out of the crashed remains of Black One and got BB-8 out (BB-8, who was intact, if a bit unsettled by what had just happened). Poe knew they were both lucky to be intact. He could remember narrowly reaching Black One just in time for the hangar to be blown up, taking people like Tallie with the explosion. Like there weren’t enough reasons to hate Kylo Ren. To want him in a prison cell.   
  
And speaking of Kylo...  
  
***  
  
It was even as Poe fished Kylo Ren out of his TIE Silencer (after he got BB-8 out as well) that he couldn’t help but feel his blood all but freeze up, like the ice on Hoth. It couldn’t be, but here he was. The long scar, the long gash — that must have been where the girl, Rey, had slashed him. He was definitely older now; when he had last seen Ben Solo, Ben had been nineteen years old, his twentieth Naming Day in the distance. Now, Kylo...  
  
He looked tired, somehow. Even as Poe struggled to lift him out of the TIE Silencer, a part of him wondered why in the Corellian hells he was doing this. After all, Kylo Ren had tortured him —  
  
Maybe in the end, he was Poe Dameron. And he wasn’t about to deny a wounded man medical attention. And maybe he was a little selfish too — he didn’t want Ben Solo to die. Not if it was at all possible to save him.   
  
Maybe he was a little selfish. Above, there was a storm brewing, and Poe had a feeling it was going to be a pretty nasty one. Full winds blowing, full rain and thunder and lightning.   
  
Selfish. Exactly.   
  
Was there shelter around? Even as Poe slung Kylo Ren’s arm around his shoulders, propping him up, he couldn’t help but feel weighed down. Like he was carrying a sack of heavy rocks.   
  
There was shelter ahead. Some sort of medical facility. Poe cleared his throat. “I know you can hear me,” he said. “Really. You’re gonna have to work with me here. I can’t carry you completely.”  
  
He could have sworn that Kylo Ren murmured something incoherent. That was good, at least.   
  
“Just a few steps further. Really.”  
  
It took a while, but they reached the shelter. Poe laid Kylo down in a bed in that moment, suddenly angry.   
Mixed with the love he still had for Ben Solo, but angry nonetheless.   
  
“How could you?” he said.   
  
Kylo Ren didn’t stir. Poe continued his rant.   
  
“How could you just...rip into my mind like that? I don’t care if it was ‘just’ an interrogation; you have no idea how much you hurt me, worse than you could ever imagine. I loved you so much, Ben...”  
  
He trailed off in that moment. It was the first time he’d said it that didn’t involve saying it in his head.   
  
“You didn’t even have any reason to do it,” Poe snapped. “You had a family who loved you, who gave a damn about you. You had _me._ Were we not enough for you?”  
  
It was drizzling outside. At least it was “only” drizzling.   
  
“You could have been so much more. You could have been a kriffing hero. You let your family down, you let me down. Are we just...nothing to you?” Poe sighed as he spoke. “I loved you. I...”   
  
He trailed off. He’d said too much. Outside, it was pouring hard. Poe was glad, at least, that they were inside. Unfortunately, both their ships were kaput. Wrecked beyond repair.   
  
“I think that’s all,” he said.   
  
He and BB-8 reactivated the medical droids in that moment. They set to work, patching Kylo Ren up, including the gash where Rey had slashed him. Poe watched, wondering if, in any way, Kylo Ren had heard his rant...and what he would say next.


End file.
